Overreaction
by Infinity King
Summary: When the Sorting Hat places Harry in Slytherin, the fit hits the shan.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter**

**Just a little something I threw together at some point.**

**Overreactions**

The Great Hall watched with bated breath as the Sorting Hat was placed atop the head of one Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived.

That sentence, of course, is not saying that the hall itself was watching with bated breath, but that the people within it were. That is actually called metonymy, which is a figurative expression, closely associated with the subject.

But I digress.

The students and teacher within The Great Hall were watching with bated breath while waiting for one Harry Potter to get sorted.

Under the confines of the hat, however, a discussion was under way.

"_I'ma place you in Slytherin!"_

"_Don't you do it."_

"_I'ma do it!"_

"_Don't you-"_

"Better be, Slytherin!"

The Great Hall erupted into a babble of conversation (once again, metonymy), shock over the Boy-Who-Lived being sorted into Slytherin of all places over taking everyone.

The babble of conversation quickly escalated, leading to a horrible argument between the entire house of Gryffindor, and the entire house of Slytherin.

Which in turn, escalated into a fist fight. The Weasley twins sent the first spell flying, followed quickly by some random Slytherin... um... Marcus Flint. Yeah, let's go with him.

Instantly the Great Hall was filled with yells and shouts. Most lower years took to hiding under the tables, but that soon ended when the tables were tipped over to be used as cover. Sadly, for those first and second years, they ended up in the line of fire.

In fact, a stray spell hit one Neville Longbottom, setting him completely on fire. The poor boy ran around for several minutes without any help. Eventually, he ran blindly into a window, and fell three stories. Or something. Eh, he was probably fine.

In any case, Professor Snape quickly began enjoying himself. Within the confusion he quickly began abusing Gryffindors left and right, only adding to the confusion.

It was Dumbledore who finally calmed everyone down, if only for a moment.

"Everyone!"

The yell caused everyone to freeze.

"Please, calm down. Are you really going to get so upset over one eleven year old boy getting sorted into a school house?"

Everyone exchanged glanced, before calmly nodding, and going back to firing spells at one enother.

Dumbledore shrugged, and joined in on the fun.

Meanwhile, Quirrell, or however the fuck you spell his name, give me a break it's like 2 O'Clock AM and I'm supposed to be working on an essay.

And here I am breaking the fourth wall again.

In any case, that one guy no one cares about who died in the first book, was sitting calmly in his seat. In the back of his head, Voldemort was cackling. He had a genius idea!

Using the confusion as cover, he had Quirr... Quirell? Anyway, that guy, go and nab Harry Potter. He quickly left the school, and had that guy revive him using Harry's blood, his father's bone, that guy's hand via a possibly satanic ritual in a graveyard.

In any case, back at the school, all the teachers had been brutally murdered, and the students had set up a new society within the school. Ravenclaw's took control first, everyone with a name gained the most power. So maybe four or five.

This quickly changed, with the Hufflepuff's gaining dominance, and creating a communist society, with Cedric Diggory at the helm. Sadly, he was arrested for tax evasion – apparently he had been avoiding paying his taxes by changing his name from Edward Cullen to Cedric Diggory.

Weird how those things happen. In any case, the society devolved within minutes, and everyone ended up eating each other, the end.

Wait, what?

**Author's Note:**

**I wrote this a while back, and completely and utterly forgot about. That is most likely because it was 2 O'Clock AM when I was writing it, and I needed to write an essay that was due later in the day. So I was tired, and created this... whatever it is. I am actually very curious as to how this came about, as my memories of the event itself are very vague. **

**In any case, it's a parody of Slytherin!Harry, in which the world suddenly explodes when Harry is sorted into Slytherin. Clever? No, not really. Just a bit of fun.**

**No offense to anyone who has done this, I actually have no problem with it myself. Just wrote it for a few laughs, y'know? Consider it the 2 AM ravings of a mad man.**

**I should probably read through what I wrote, but I honestly don't care about it. Besides, the chances of anyone reading this one shot are slim to none, considering how clustered the Harry Potter section is right now. **

**So, yeah. Thanks for reading... this. **


End file.
